Closer

My heart dropped into my stomach and I felt all but speechlessness.

I wasn't sure if I was ready or not. It hadn't been quite a month since my break-up. My sleep schedule, my eating, and my emotions we're the definition of unstable.


I thought that I had to make him wait. If I didn't he was going to feel like a "rebound" and if he didn't feel that way, I sure as hell would.

I told him that I would be ready in two weeks, I wanted to clean myself up if nothing else.

We spent the entire day together. Talking, laughing and joking like we always did, but this time we talked about other things to, families, lives, struggles and everything in between. Learning, memorizing.

It didn't stop. The next day was the same. We spent countless hours sitting on my couch talking about the troubles we had faced, where we were and where we thought we were going. We talked about love and losses, about life and sadness, about work and friendships.

Suddenly the night was not so young anymore, two lonely people, with hopes of something new sitting beside one another, contemplating what was supposed to happen next. that is exactly when he told me he loved me,

Shocked, surprised, heart racing, the only word that could escape my lips was "why?"

I couldn't remember the last time something as wonderful was real, but it was.

Everythng he had ever said to me was real, no matter ho hard I tried to dismiss it,